“Venkat, I don’t feel the mojo in my life,I’m really busy, but there’s not much happiness.”

That’s how a client, let’s call him Sam, started our coaching session, I could see the strain and exhaustion in his features.

As we dug deeper, a stark picture emerged.

Sam was clocking over 70 hours a week at work, and in between all the overwhelm got only 5 hours of quality time with his family. This imbalance was clearly the root of his unhappiness.

Now, I could’ve told Sam how to live his life, but I saw a better opportunity. I wanted him to truly understand how he was spending his time. So I suggested we do a role balance exercise.

It’s a wonderful tool, really. If God gave you everything, how would you spend your time? You review how you’d like to spend your time across different roles if you had an ideal life.

The results were eye-opening. Sam realized that in a 168-hour week, his ‘ideal life’ only accounted for 160 hours. We busted the “I have no time.” myth. He was amazed, thinking, “Oh my God, I actually have time!”

Next, we started to investigate how he is using his time.

Turns out, a lot of it was spent at his gaming station. It was his stress buster. He’d come home, have dinner, start gaming – sometimes until 1 or 2 AM. That was his ‘me’ time.

Instead of giving into the urge of telling him that is wrong, I realized I needed to reframe his thinking.

So I asked him a pivotal question:

“Sam, is there a chance that by focusing on video games and yourself, you could be irresponsible towards your family?”

It took a minute for that to sink in.

Then Sam started tearing up. “My God, you’re right. I’m actually being selfish. I’m taking care of myself, but not my family.”

To cut a long story short, Sam started reorganising his life. He began proactively managing his calendar and carving out dedicated family time. Now, he’s far more balanced, far happier, and far less stressed.

And that’s the key, isn’t it?

Sometimes, what we think is self-care can actually be selfish. True balance comes from consciously allocating our time to what truly matters.

So, I ask you: How are you spending your 168 hours? Is it time for your own mojo makeover?

*** 

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